I'm Just Gonna Say Yes

I have been in quite the valley of despair, suffering and confliction lately. So many things lay heavy on my heart, so  many "what ifs" and "why nots" that I have been putting on replay in my head. Quite frankly I am putting a lot of trust in myself and my circumstances. Quite frankly I am sinning. 

It's been one of those weeks. One of those weeks where both your sons are teething at the exact same time, your daughter starts 1st grade and  your husband prepares to start a new job. One of those weeks that during it I put a lot of trust in myself to suck it up and get things done! Oh quiet time, well I will get to that, after all I am being a bad homemaker if I sit down and have a few precious minutes of prayer and fellowship. After all I am being a bad homemaker if my house isnt spotless all the time, and my bathroom doesnt smell like roses and my children are not dressed to a T. Isnt this right? 

Truth is if this is whats right then I'd like to be wrong a whole lot more often. Out of this valley of confliction the Lords showing me a whole lot of truth, truth that time with  Him, is much more important for my family then a spotless home. Oh conviction you slay me! 

So for now, though I am still walking through a dismal valley, I am going to just say "yes." Yes when the Lord calls me to some quiet time, yes to praying for someone more diligently, yes to playing with my kids more, yes to taking my hubs out on more dates, yes to exploring and laughing and loving. Yes to being me and finding joy in the unique ways the Lord made me. He made only one of me, and its time I stop comparing, wishing, lusting to make myself dress or act like other people, and time to start desiring a little more of allowing the Spirit to mold me into His image, instead of trying to mold Him into mine. Will you just say "yes" with me?